Jump into… Mental Health and Diving

So, despite this being the longest blog post in the series, this is a subject that has been on my mind to write about for a while, and there was never going to be a ‘perfect time’, so here goes… 

Having considered doing this for a while, my main concern was at first the ‘embarrassment’, and then my personal feelings of not making my personal life public. The more I thought about it though, how will things ever change if we are too afraid to talk and make others aware that they are not alone? 

Having been in the dive industry for a number of years now, like many others I have been faced with the relentless disparaging comments, and bullying from some individuals. Entering the industry as a young, 21 year old female – what could I possibly have to offer in the industry? ‘No life experience’ and could not possibly have a ‘grown up attitude’ at that age. The fact is, we never know the past history of anyone. 

At 15, my dad passed away. He ‘committed’ suicide; I have always hated that term as it seems as though an offence has been made. At the time, I was embarrassed about what had happened. Mental health was not as spoken of, and when asked what happened, I would just say he was in an accident. Over the years I realised that I had no reason to be embarrassed, and it was completely ridiculous and offensive to his memory that I was doing this. At this age, I quickly grew up. I learnt that nothing was to be taken for granted. By the age of 21, I had already been in the Fire Service for 3 years, a disciplined service, being faced with life or death decisions on a regular basis and at the same time, had been teaching for 2 years as an instructor, I then started Duttons Divers. At the age of 21, I already had a fair bit of ‘life experience’. 

The reason for the brief backstory, and trust me, it is very brief, is that following this came the bullying in the industry. Up to this point I could manage what had been thrown at me. When I made the decision to take on Vivian Quarry, I was met with day to day comments of ‘what do you know, you won’t last 2 seconds in the industry’…. Mocking messages about courses that I had ran, comments made to my customers saying that I didn’t know what I was doing and that they should come to them, and relentless comments of how poor I was at conducting myself in the industry. These comments started to drive me down. I began to focus on every small negative, that I forgot everything that I had achieved: Becoming a Course Director, having a successful business, a career outside of diving that at the time I enjoyed, the house and car I wanted, but none of that seemed to matter. 

Those comments at the time were my breaking point, and I began to feel like there was no way forward. I had no drive to get myself out of the dark hole that had been created by these people – some that I didn’t even know. It took me a while to come to realise that the people who I was letting do this had literally no bearing on what I was doing. Nothing had changed; the business was still successful and growing; I did not need them. I found it easier to ignore the comments (still a mistake); I contacted a local mental health charity for support, which as the time I was highly embarrassed about, but now could not care less. It took me 4 years to get to a point where I felt strong enough and in the right mind set to challenge the behaviour and take action. 

So I know that this very brief post isn’t exactly the happiest that I have ever written. But it is a period in my life that I think it is more than necessary to talk about. The amount of messages that I have received from others now speaking out about their own personal experiences of bullying in the industry… all because of one post. I could have spoken about this years ago, and I have no doubt that others in the industry have their own stories to tell… so tell them. There’s no reason to hide them away, and it could mean the world of difference to someone else and help us to put an end to this type of behaviour in the industry. Those that are ignorant to other’s past experiences, and make judgement that they know better, have no idea what any person has gone through.

It’s clear that as an industry we have tolerated bullying, whether this be on social media, the “inter-agency banter” or between dive centres and clubs. The fact is that none of it is acceptable and it will only be made unacceptable if it is challenged. The fact that someone is from another agency doesn’t mean that it is acceptable to call them names. When someone wears their equipment in a way different to yours, it doesn’t warrant a comment that what they are doing is wrong and highlighting it to use it for your own personal gain all over social media. No negative comments are necessary. These types of situations don’t make derogatory responses acceptable.

In diving we are in an amazing industry that allows us to dive with people from all walks of life, people that we would probably never be in the same room together with if it wasn’t for diving… and it doesn’t matter what someones background is, who they dive with, what equipment or brand that they use; it has no impact on your life what they do and bullying anyone is in no way acceptable. So my advice is that as a whole we challenge this behaviour, report those responsible and we can all work together to show that this type of behaviour will no longer be tolerated.

Remember – You are always welcome to call into either of my centres for a brew, chat or dive!

Clare began Duttons Divers at just 19 years old and a short while later became one of the world’s youngest PADI Course Directors. Find out more at www.duttonsdivers.com